Yes, I have a girl crush. My main girl crush for years, namely Chelsea Handler has been supplanted. It’s ok Chelsea. You and I are still twins in some alternate universe. But now the object of my desire is comedian Amy Schumer. Her show, Inside Amy Schumer (the name is an homage to the golden age of porn titles from the 70s), deals a lot with sex. She runs the gamut from getting told by her boyfriend that he has AIDS, to sexting, to her “Going Deep” segments where she interviews random, non-celebrity guests. She also likes to embarrass people in street interviews about their pubic grooming. It’s all disturbingly raw and funny.
Don’t ask me how she pulls that off. Inter-spliced is Amy on stage talking about what a slut she is. I have waited so long for a woman to truly embrace that title. I was always a little disappointed with Chelsea Handler’s book The Horizontal Life. Even she doesn’t talk that graphically about sex in it.
Being empowered about sex and when and where we have it is an awesome thing. No woman should feel badly about the number of sexual conquests they’ve had or what behaviors they’ve done in bed (hello, anal and shrimping). It is all about the spectrum of sexuality. It’s time for women to really get comfortable with it. And yes, I have two daughters whom I believe will benefit from this thinking – although it makes my husband cringe, plug his ears and cry softly into a pillow at night.
I will hopefully instill in my daughters the ability make sound sexual judgments while they are slutting around – whatever that means by 2028. So my sweet, sweet may be surprised to hear that she is a lovely role model as far as I am concerned. That is one of, any reasons why I am in love with her. Would I go lesbian with her? Perhaps after a few drinks in that other parallel universe but I’d sure as heck at least let her try to seduce me with that dirty mouth of hers.