Dr. Kat’s Practical Tantra: Partner Yoga for Better Sex

There are many reasons to practice yoga; for exercise, for spiritual purposes or just because it makes you feel good. Practicing yoga with your lover not only opens you up to these benefits but can also positively affect your relationships.  Partner yoga is not just practicing next to your partner paralleling their postures. It is it’s own form of yoga.  Whatever discipline of yoga you study (Hatha, Inyegar, etc.) postures can be modified to incorporate a partner in a single posture.

 

Breath is the focal point of all yoga. You learn how to fully and completely breathe while coordinating that breath with movement. When you practice with a partner you also get the added benefits of moving deeper into the postures along with increased physical and spiritual bonding. You basically commune with your partner in breath and movement. By setting an intention for your practice (deciding to dedicate a session to the healing of yourself or someone else for instance) you can use yoga as a form of collective meditation (yoga is considered prayer in motion).   It can also help to align chakras between partners as well — creating more harmony and balance in the relationship.

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The following is a flow of five partner postures. The concept of having a “flow” of postures helps to generate the energy and can increase the comfort of moving from one posture to the next. It is for that reason that I suggest you follow the suggested flow in order. It is helpful to practice in a quiet environment. You and your partner may also want to begin with a short meditation or visualization. Stay in each posture for a minimum of five breaths. These postures are from the Anahata Yoga Flow in which I am certified.

 

Weeping Willow

Stand by your partner’s side about twototwo to three feet apart facing the same direction. With the hand closest to your partner, grab one another’s forearm (GI Joe grip). Create tension with this grip and then allow your body to melt to the opposite side. Lead with your head, neck and hip. Keep your feet in line with your partner’s. Repeat on the next side. This posture fosters trust and stretches each side of your body balancing both the feminine and masculine sides of the body and brain.

 

 

ForwardBend

Face one another at a 90-degree angle. Hands on the back of one another’s shoulders. Keep your head in alignment (don’t drop your chin or raise your head up too high causing discomfort). Feet together or slightly apart. When ready, release slowly by taking a step towards one another. Forward bends are very calming to the nervous system. They can help open up blockages in the chakras in order to help you both align your energies with one another.

 

Gentle BackBend

Face one another again with your feet together or slightly apart. You should be several feet away from your partner. Grasp your partner’s forearm, gripping while slowly leaning back with straight legs. Gaze at your partner or slowly (if comfortable for you) keep gaze and chin parallel. For more challenge, lean your head all the way back looking behind you. Slowly come up chin first. Eyes open. This posture opens the heart chakra and the whole front side of the body. Opening your heart chakra creates more compassion for your partner.

 

Downward Dog

One partner gets into the downward dog posture (hands and feet 6 inches apart, straight back and legs, heels as close to the ground as possible – body full engaged with the belly in). The other partner then faces the opposite direction and backs up to the partner’s buttocks. Slowly lean back onto the partner in downward dog and raise your arms over your head. Stay here for a few moments and then repeat while swapping positions with your partner. Be careful to slowly come out of the back bend. Generally, the larger person doing the back bend should keep their legs outside of the stance of the smaller partner in downward dog; while the smaller person doing the backbend should keep their feet inside of the stance of the larger person doing downward dog. Downward dog strengthens the whole body and it can also help you to feel the breath of your partner and allow you to synchronize it. It is heart opening while stretching both sides of the body.

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Child’s Pose

One partner comes to the floor in child’s pose (come to your knees, sitting back on your heels, slowly come forward putting your forehead on the ground, palms at your side laying face up). The other partner backs up to the partner’s buttock and tailbone-to-tailbone slowly lowers themselves into a backbend over their partner. The partner in backbend then reaches over their head to grasp the hands of the partner in child’s pose. Child’s pose helps to calm and release stress while the backbend opens the heart chakra. Again, you can coordinate your breathing while stretching both sides of the body.  You are also able to line up your chakras with your partner. It is a nice final posture as you transition into lovemaking or foreplay.

 

If you’ve never practiced yoga before go slowly. Work with a yoga teacher if possible and make sure your doctor approves of the flow. As you progress you’ll find that each of you will move more deeply into the postures. I’ve suggested to many clients to plan a yoga date by following your practice with a slow extravagant dinner or moving into sex play. Taking your partner practice outdoors can also help you connect to the oneness of nature. Partner yoga compliments Tantric practice as well. Yoga is considered the act of creating union with your partner while Tantric practice is thought of as an expansion of your sexuality and spirituality with your partner. Both work well at bridging this duality and growing your relationship. Enjoy…

 


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